Sunday, June 6, 2010

Marriage!! Is It Really That Hard?!


So as I was contemplating what to blog about, the topic of marriage jumped to the forefront of my mind. Being that marriage is on of the biggest and few LIFE COMMITMENTS we will make, and I find it to be a very interesting topic. From meeting someone to dating them, to falling in love, to marriage how do things change so drastically? How do you fall out of love so quickly after making the commitment? How do you keep getting divorces and remarrying?? I mean is marriage really that hard?

First of all I want to say that even though I'm not nor have I ever been married, I still think that I have a pretty good understanding of it. Through teaching and seeing others marriage in action, I have learned what to do and what not to do. I understand that people marry for varying reasons. Some marry for convenience, some for sex, some out of desperation, and some for love. For whatever reason you may be marrying I think it is important to at least know the person you are marrying. You should know before hand that you are taking vows and that those vows should be taken seriously. It is like you are signing a contract of sorts, and as you can't get out of a regular contract without a fight, the same should be for marriage.

Having seen my share of FAILED marriages, I think that when looking for a spouse you should be looking for someone you like. Sounds simple and obvious right? Well obviously it is not as simple as it sounds. Anyway as I was saying, you should be looking for someone you like. Not just physically liking them(although that is very important), but liking their personality and character is important as well. You should be looking for someone you can confide in. You should be looking for someone you can trust with your secrets. You should be looking for someone's shoulder that you can cry on. You should be looking for someone you can talk to without feeling judged. You should be looking for a best friend. If your spouse is your best friend it won't be as easy to mistreat them. Some wouldn't even treat their boys the way they treat their wife.

Another thing is that If you are a man and you're married then it is unnecessary to constantly remind the woman that you are the "head" of the house. If you really were a good head then you wouldn't feel so insecure and have to constantly say your the head when she doesn't agree with you or submit to you. Submission is not going to be the major pillar in my marriage, it will be agreement and friendship. There is power in agreement and if you can get your wife to agree with you without being a jerk then you will have a very happy marriage. If you can just agree then that is more power than forcing someone to submit to you, because if you have to do that you'll always be at each others throats.

Divorce is a terrible thing in my opinion. I say this because you are breaking covenant and splitting up your family. In my opinion it should be a lot harder for SOME to get a divorce(the reason I say some is because if your getting abused definitely get OUT). You shouldn't be getting two and three divorces and getting remarried two or three times, because that to me can make you seem unstable and a bad decision maker. You should have done a very thorough background check before you even contemplated marriage. That includes meeting family and friends, seeing how they interact with their parents, watching their body language and attitude when their upset, and a good ole fashion credit check(LOL). If someone is trying to keep you from doing the fore mentioned then you better run.

All In all marriage should be a place of happiness, peace, and tranquility(LOL, sounds funny huh?) It shouldn't be a prison. You should be married to your best friend, and as in all friendships their will be disagreements and challenges, but just stick it out. I mean really, Is Marriage that hard??


**ALL Comments whether in agreement or disagreement are welcome**

FIRST TIME!!!! FINALLY!!!


What's happening, First blog and just wanted to introduce some topics I will be discussing in the coming weeks

Blog Topics:
Why Are So Many People Influenced by Celebrities??
Why I Dislike Tyler Perry Films??
Is Marriage really that hard?? and Many More

I Will also start doing full movie reviews as well, so Stay Tuned

and by the way I am a Virgo Brutha, and these are my Thoughts